To Be a Woman
What does it mean to be a woman?
I have been pondering that question lately, turning it over in my mind like a gardener turns over his soil. It’s an incredibly complicated question as the definition of womanhood has changed greatly over the last 50 years. No longer adhering to the “seen and not heard” mentality of yesteryear, women are showing up as makers and creators, as mothers and doctors, as CEO’s and activists. Times they are a’changin! Being a woman is far more nuanced than ever before making a new definition of womanhood unique to each woman herself.
About a month ago I had a photoshoot with three women I met in a newlyweds class 15 years ago. They brought along their daughters and as I watched them through my lens I began to wonder what they thought about this journey they’re on…the journey of becoming a woman. What kind of societal pressures do they feel? What do they believe of their value and worth? From where do they draw their strength and can a female be powerful? It made me think about my own daughter and wonder what the world will tell her as she gets older. I want to be the first one to speak life over her, to spin a good and healthy and true narrative around her, and give her words and weapons to fight the inevitable lies that will come against her.
Then I started to reflect back even further…back to my own journey through womanhood. And that’s when things started to get real. As I waded through all the muck and mire of my memory three things came back to me over and over again, themes that spoke deadly lies to my heart that only recently have I started to untangle.
Emotions can and should be used to manipulate.
My value and worth is directly tied to my body size and shape and what I choose to do with it. I thought the only way to get and keep a man’s attention and affection was by keeping my outward appearance in healthier shape than the inward condition of my soul.
My words and my voice are not meaningful so I had better find another way to get attention (back to lie #2).
Oh my heart!! How many wasted years and tears believing outright untruths about myself. But I am no different than any other woman. We all have our demons to battle, a web of ugly to untangle. I’m still walking out of the wreckage but I’m walking out as someone who has been tested and tried, someone who has been shaped and molded by experience but not defined by it. And I’m walking out with a rootedness in the truth of my identity, a light against this earthly darkness.
But this photoshoot and these women and these questions have unlocked something inside of me. Who are we as women? What makes us strong? What constitutes beauty and what makes us beautiful? What does a powerful woman look like? Every woman will have different answers and I for one can’t wait to tell them through my lens.
So, inspired by those mommas and their daughters, I will be sharing stories of women regularly. I hope you will take the time to read their words, glean morsels of wisdom, be inspired, and expand your understanding of the women in your lives. For through understanding, we grow.
All My Love,
